Adventures in Rachel-land

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

My Almost Three Year Old

  • Counts to 17.
  • Is a picky eater, but cooperative enough to try a bite of anything.
  • Is pottytrained, but can't quite button his own pants.
  • is Generally cooperative and helpful.
  • Still needs a nap in the afternoon.
  • Is almost too big to carry around.
  • Loves to help in the kitchen.
  • Sleeps with a rotating cast of stuffed animals.
  • Has a hard time settling down to sleep at bedtime.
  • Loves being read to.
  • Enjoys trucks, dinosaurs, race cars and Dora.
  • Looked me in the face in the middle of the tantrum and asked me to help him. I asked him with what and he asked me to help him pull it together. When I asked him how I could help, he said, "do the breathing thing". So I looked him in the face and we took 10 deep breaths together so he could calm down. Apparently telling him to take deep breaths has internalized at some point.
  • Loves hiding under a blanket while we pretend to look for him.
  • Loves to wrestle and tickle with Daddy.
  • Loves fruit and bread and cheese.
  • Enjoys showers.
  • loves daddy and mama and mimi.
  • says a prayer every day where he thanks god for poop, basketball, and mimi.
  • is willing to give kisses at bedtime, he is generally resistant to hugs.
  • Hangs out with Aunt Abigail during the day.
  • is pretty shy around new people.
  • Is smart and handsome and soo funny.
  • is a gift.

Biggest Blogging Loser Week 3

Wow! These titles are so creative!

My third weigh in is at 213. It was not a great week on either the diet or exercise front. I walked at the gym for about 20 minutes twice last week. Then, while I stuck with the sugar and vegetable resolutions, I didn't do so well with my overall calories. I gave in to mayo on sandwiches several times. This week should be better. All I can do is keep trying.

I never feel worse about my body then when I am working on improving it. I am sure there is an interesting psychological reason behind this, but I don't know what it is. When I am actively dieting, I look in the mirror and I feel disgusting. How could I be so fat? I roll over in the middle of the night and my stomach presses against my arm and I feel like the ugliest person in the world. However, when I am not focusing on my diet, I look in the mirror and I think, eh, that's not so bad. I always know I am overweight, but it seems so minor when I am not focused on it. It's important for me to get healthier. I know this. But psychologically, being on a diet is not good for my self image. It's strange.

Pressing on. This week I am going to try to exercise every day and really focus on those calories. I also need to work on not completely losing it on the weekend.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Biggest Blogging Loser Week 2!

So I did my first weigh in and in week 1, I lost 4 pounds. I am finding it more challenging to eat less calories at home in a snow storm then I do at the office. So, I think it might have gone better if I hadn't eaten a little too much pasta standing over the sink on Sunday.

Things I did right: I drank my water, I walked every other morning, and I took a tupperware container of veggies to work every day. I went out with Bethany on Saturday night, we went to a Italian restaurant and I only ordered the bruschetta and some potato soup. The soup was very creamy, so it was probably pretty high calorie, however it was a reasonable portion. I consider this a victory because I did not bury my face in a vat of chicken alfredo. It was still very satisfying, so I say it was a good choice.

Things I failed at: Should have walked a bit more, and done better at portion control at home. Especially at the end of the week when we ran out of veggies. Next time we run out of fruits and veggies, I need to make a grocery run. I did ask Abigail to buy more this week, but what seems to be happening is that when I eat fruits and veggies, then Barry and Ledger want to eat them as well. Resulting in net less veggies available.

January 10th, 2010 - 216 pounds.

Friday, January 07, 2011

Biggest Blogging Loser

In October of 2009 I weighed 230 pounds. My job was offering a lunch hour Weight Watchers program at the office and they were picking up the tab for half of the cost. I joined and worked the program, which is basically just counting calories. I lost 35 pounds by March 2010. Then I dropped out. And slowly put a little back on at a time.

On December 1st, 2010 I was back to 210. And then...I lost my mind and vacuumed up every potato chip, taco, coke and cookie in the entire state of Texas. On New Years Day I was 225 pounds.

So here is the thing, I've never been thin. I am a librarian with a pretty sedentary lifestyle and a fear of vegetables. I don't even want to be thin. Here is what I want.....I want to be able to walk around Paris with my husband when I am forty. I want my clothes to fit. I don't want that hideous fat roll. And I want to be able to get off the floor to chase my 2 year old.

I know that I can do it, I've done it before. It just takes paying attention to what I eat for awhile and moving my body more on purpose. So here is what I am doing.
1. I gave up all processed sugars for the 3 months of the contest. COKES! cookies, candy,
2. I am adding vegetables, trying to eat two servings a day.
3. I am doing some form of exercise 3 times a week. Right now it is a walk, but I hope to improve the value of the work over the next few weeks.
4. I am doing the biggest blogging loser contest to give me some motivation.

Here is what I am not doing:
1. I am not giving up dinner with my family. My sister cooks our dinners, so it is usually kid appropriate, which usually includes a normal level of cheese, sour cream, or bread. So I try to keep my portions small and do really well for the rest of the day.

I want to be strong. I want to be healthy. And I really want to be a good example to my son. So here we go.


Kids are Awesome

I had a whole post planned for today on my 'almost three year old'. However, I would like to put that off for a day and instead focus on why my son has lost his mind.

He 2 and 10 months and has gone from being a charming EASY child to a whining monster. And none of it makes sense or can be watched out for. I left the bedroom before him and that is cause for panicked screaming about me leaving him. I pick him up, tell him to take a breath and we move on. I gave him the round bread instead of the square bread and that is cause to sink to the floor screaming and crying. I pick him up, tell him to take a breath and the screaming continues. I send him to his quiet spot on the stairs. Now, the stairs come down right into the very open kitchen/living space. He is not being isolated. He can see me. This causes a screaming meltdown. I sit beside him, we talk about it, we move on. I take a BITE, one bite, of my bread and he starts to scream. I ask him whats wrong and all I get is some garbled mess about how he doesn't want me to eat before him. Okay, I'm trying to be patient and supportive of his emotional development. However, I'm gonna draw the line at allowing the child to dictate the sequence in which I eat my breakfast. Back to the steps to calm down. We repeat this cycle, the crisis, the crying, the calming, about 10 times before I go to work.

What the frick? I keep thinking he must be in some sort of physical pain or something. I don't know what to do, really. We aren't being tremendously consistent with him about it. Screaming that doesn't stop is 'disciplined' , but his crying/fussing is not really responded to the same way every time. I sometimes pick him up and sit with him on my lap until he stops, his father tends to snap at him or send him to the steps, and I try various consequences along the way. My reaction varies depending on what else I am trying to do at the moment, or how much time I have, or just based on my analysis of the legitimacy of the complaint. "I fell down" or I wanted to peel my own orange" gets a bit more tenderness than "I didn't want the refriderator closed" or "I don't like your shirt". Would a more consistent approach help or do we just power through and it will be over when it is over?

The tantrums are generally short lived, he doesn't hit/slap/bite, and we have the time and flexibility to address it. So I know it could be so. much. worse. It's just wearying.


Monday, January 03, 2011


To the person who thought they needed to bring peppermint flavored chocolate covered pretzels to the staff workroom today....I stick my tongue out at you.

Will power. It's relatively easy on the first day, check back with me on the 10th.