Adventures in Rachel-land

Friday, January 07, 2011

Kids are Awesome

I had a whole post planned for today on my 'almost three year old'. However, I would like to put that off for a day and instead focus on why my son has lost his mind.

He 2 and 10 months and has gone from being a charming EASY child to a whining monster. And none of it makes sense or can be watched out for. I left the bedroom before him and that is cause for panicked screaming about me leaving him. I pick him up, tell him to take a breath and we move on. I gave him the round bread instead of the square bread and that is cause to sink to the floor screaming and crying. I pick him up, tell him to take a breath and the screaming continues. I send him to his quiet spot on the stairs. Now, the stairs come down right into the very open kitchen/living space. He is not being isolated. He can see me. This causes a screaming meltdown. I sit beside him, we talk about it, we move on. I take a BITE, one bite, of my bread and he starts to scream. I ask him whats wrong and all I get is some garbled mess about how he doesn't want me to eat before him. Okay, I'm trying to be patient and supportive of his emotional development. However, I'm gonna draw the line at allowing the child to dictate the sequence in which I eat my breakfast. Back to the steps to calm down. We repeat this cycle, the crisis, the crying, the calming, about 10 times before I go to work.

What the frick? I keep thinking he must be in some sort of physical pain or something. I don't know what to do, really. We aren't being tremendously consistent with him about it. Screaming that doesn't stop is 'disciplined' , but his crying/fussing is not really responded to the same way every time. I sometimes pick him up and sit with him on my lap until he stops, his father tends to snap at him or send him to the steps, and I try various consequences along the way. My reaction varies depending on what else I am trying to do at the moment, or how much time I have, or just based on my analysis of the legitimacy of the complaint. "I fell down" or I wanted to peel my own orange" gets a bit more tenderness than "I didn't want the refriderator closed" or "I don't like your shirt". Would a more consistent approach help or do we just power through and it will be over when it is over?

The tantrums are generally short lived, he doesn't hit/slap/bite, and we have the time and flexibility to address it. So I know it could be so. much. worse. It's just wearying.



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